Looking and Not Touching

I have a long history with my wife. I have known her since I was 18. We dated during that time and decided we wanted different things after a few months. It wasn’t a bad break up, so we remained friends. We became really good friends…we told each other our dirt. She knows about all my random encounters in college….the nights I spent hugging the toilet due to too much alcohol….the girls who walked in and out of my one bedroom apartment. And I knew everything about her….her best girlfriend who she “experimented” with….the clubbing every night of the week….and the nicknames she gave every guy she dated. It worked. Until one fateful night when we took things further than we expected..and three years after that we walked down the aisle proclaiming our love for each other.

But what happens when you marry someone who knows your past….all your dirt….your tendencies. Example, during a day out shopping.

Me: Wanna go in here? Looks like they have some good stuff in here for you…

Wife: Ok….oooh they do have cute stuff.

Twenty minutes later we left…and my wallet was a lot lighter.

Wife: Cute girl in there….

Me: Who?

Wife: The one you were checking out…

Me: No….I..wasn’t….no….she….no…

Wife: She’s totally your type…..nice body….red hair…beautiful eyes. I saw your technique..you walk by….glance real fast. Then glance real fast at me….so I know you were checking to see if I was watching you. And then when we caught eyes and you blurted some random thing that didnt make sense….

Me: What? What I said didnt make sense?

Wife: You asked me if I like apple sauce. Why would that be a conversation to have in a woman’s clothing store…

I was guilty.

That’s what happens. And it is a trap. Anywhere you may go, your significant other will spend her first few minutes scanning the environment for possible eye candy for you. And once she locks her target, she spends a few minutes waiting for you to look at her designated target. And boom, we have no chance.

But, I don’t see anything wrong with looking…I know there are guys who my wife thinks are attractive. I know her type. …I know about her secretive way she looks at guys. But I don’t call her on it…cause it doesn’t bother me.


2 thoughts on “Looking and Not Touching

  1. water4inferno

    My husband and I also went through the date, breakup, reconnect and get married scenario. Hahaha, I always tell him, “Hunny, you can look at the menu, just don’t order from it. If you want to order from it, make sure its something I want too.” 🙂


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